Do you often daydream of the day “they” put you in charge for a while?
Are you frustrated by having your most brilliant ideas dismissed by your CEO, because they are “completely irrelevant to what we do as a company” supposedly?
Has your CIO instituted a BYOD policy, without explaining how it will impact your mobile workplace consumption of adult entertainment?
Are you looking to get the most out of your busy day, through the optimization of bathroom visits, coffee breaks and personal internet shopping?
A lot of consultants would be more than happy to answer these questions, for a price.
And with an obvious agenda. The fact is, business consultants are in the business of helping other businesses do business better with better best-practices essential to a business’ core business. Their recommendations will always represent the interests of management, without taking into consideration the feelings of you, the every working stiffs of Parnell.
Let’s face it. Nothing you say or do will ever dissuade your employer of the absurd belief that he is the boss of you. There is a disconnect here. You are the boss of you! Everyone knows that. You’ve made this fact abundantly clear throughout your prolonged adolescence. But your boss doesn’t care.
In these difficult times (unlike all the other times, which passed so smoothly, we hardly noticed), everyday-working-Jo(e)s need an adviser, someone to help them navigate the treacherous currents of their dead-end careers. Someone who’s been there, and done that, and is willing to revisit the entire nightmare on behalf of people who don’t know what they’re in for. I want to be that person.
I want to share with you my learnings from almost 20 years in the workplace. My core-competencies may have shifted over that time, but I think I have a good story to tell going forward. And I can tell it in the fresh, original language that only a storyteller with skin in the game can add value as we take this journey.
Occasionally, or probably never, I will post advice in response to the hot items that impact you, the cornflower-blue-collared Working-stiffs of Parnell. Drawing from an erratically elliptic career, bridging two centuries, I will tell you how to feign interest in workplace gossip; give you my top ten cyber-stalking do’s and dont’s; make an argument for wearing Birkenstocks to work every day (not just dress-down Friday); having fun with PowerPoint; and much, much more.
So stop by once in a while, in the off-chance that I actually follow-through with this dumb-ass idea.
Is Jesus in your workplace?
He’s a top salesguy with the company. They call him the miracle worker. But he always seems a bit low this time of year, for some reason.
You should offer to hang with him sometime.
He said maybe in three days.